Weeeee! Birthday Week!

Been busy busy busy busy and happy, which is a first and plus for a while. I still get upset when I think of Popeye but so far, I am good.

My birthday is this Thursday. I will be 25. Yes, I am 1/4 of a century year old. Call me old, call me ancient, call me 20th Century Granny! I don't care. I have been feeling the effects of age namely bad back, more allergies and worries about getting old but not so much decrepit and useless. A little useless but I am fine.

I have been doing well in school and thankful have no class this Friday which means I can go home Thursday for my birthday and go out to eat with my parents. I am not sure where to go out to eat but I want both of my parents to be happy about where we go and not feel upset or disgusted with the food. So I will look up places and consult with them when I get home Thursday about it.

As far as presents go, I have quite a bit on my mind but not sure if my parents will go for buying it for me. A cake, a dinner, and money is fine. Or mom said she would take me out for shopping because I need new bras. I am actually bigger than I have led myself on to believe all these years. I need new shoes, socks, and maybe I can talk her into a few shirts or clothes while I am at it. xD Lol I already got a check in the mail from my Grandmother Betty which was sweet of her. I am going to write her a thank-you letter and deposit it this weekend. I am kind of hoping a get a little bit more but I am not bent on draining my parents dry. They do so much for me already.

I think I will do a Birthday Image for myself. It has been ages since I have done one and I am in a real artistic mood lately. I have already done a few images for my story, I drew a Tiger and Bunny image that I did for V-day but it's long pass due for that I still like the image, just questionable on the anatomy. I have created two new characters, hero-related. I am still developing backstories. They are not superpower heroes though, just regular vigilantes who felt like they could do something in the world. They are step-siblings who like each other but remain friends, yet the are obvious with how much they care for one another, and willing to go out of their way for one another. I was on a Hero Character Game where you can make you down hero character with their factory, and I was like....well this is fun. xD Lol

Anyhoo, I have been artistic and out of my depression slump. I kept a journal about any down-like mood I had last week when I was depressed over Popeye, turning older, and kind of alone with not many people to really connect with. But Tiger & Bunny dubbed episodes brought me out of the slump a little and I realized...that show is basically the only thing right now giving me any joy in life. I love Tiger so much. I was on a bend of wanting everything Tiger & Bunny, especially the plushies, pillows, wall scrolls, reading yaoi Doujins, checking up for the new dubbed episodes, and such. And then I started to watch Sabrina The Animated Series and got back into Batman Beyond and now I am preoccupied with making sure I don't get depressed. I am living now....lazily...but still.

So, it is getting late, gotta get up early, weirdly craving pizza again. I had a friend visit me last Sunday and I showed him around the campus and took him to Crooked Crust. He enjoyed it and really admired the campus. I like being open with him and spending time with him. He's super intelligent with quantum physics, mechanics, science, math....ugh how does he do it!?! He is already 26, and he has owned his own golf course that he built from the ground up. Sometimes I forget half the stuff he says because it is just way up there pass my own intelligence in those fields but I find it so fascinating.

G+ is Stupid

Why can't companies stop buying out other companies or websites? I want Google to remain Google and Blogger to remain Blogger or YouTube to remain YouTube. There is no sense connecting them to one another and transferring data from one site to the next. I want to work on a site with its own features and provided information, not transfer information from one to the other. I like to keep somethings separate and private from one another. You don't see me transferring all of my private settings and features on FaceBook directly to another site that is more public now do you? No. So let's keep it that way.

G+ was a failed attempt from the start. I don't see why they feel the need to compete with Facebook with stupid "unique" features that Facebook might not have. I don't like G+ and on both gmail accounts I have, I deleted my G+ accounts and their features. Good thing it won't delete everything I have on YouTube and Blogger. But now on YouTube, don't you have to have a gmail account to even sign into a YouTube? That's stupid. Really stupid. I could go on and on about how much I hate G+ but what is the point? Oh right, there is no point when concerning G+....

Moderate Forms of Depression?

Since I lost my cat Popeye, the love of my life, I have not been able to recover easily. I am still in hopes of finding him or him returning home but it depresses me and makes me break down at times thinking about him. So I am concerned for my psychological state. I fear I may have a form of slight-moderate Depression. I did a test online, which is not an accurate medical test, but from the questions these are my results.

Here are some of the things mentioned in detail. I have never heard of some of these before.

Major Depression

Major depression is a mental health disorder which causes prolonged feelings of despair, worthlessness, irritability, and fatigue (see a more complete set of depression symptoms below). Major depression can strike at any age, although it is most common in young adulthood. Both men and women can experience major depression, however the disorder is more common in women.

Depression is sometimes called the "common cold" of mental health, because it is so common--nearly 10% of the population suffers from a depressive illness in any given year, according to NIMH. It is the leading cause of disability in the US and worldwide, according to the WHO. And though effective treatments exist for depression, many people continue to suffer in silence.

Symptoms of Major Depression

• Despair and hopelessness
• Little motivation to complete even simple tasks
• Thoughts or attempts of suicide
• Low self-esteem and self-confidence
• Low energy levels, tired and run-down
• Trouble falling asleep, nightmares, waking and can't fall back asleep
• Daily life is severely affected
• Loss of sex drive
• Loss of appetite
• Loss of interest in formerly pleasurable activities
• Symptoms last longer than two months

Dysthymia

Dysthymia, or dysthymic disorder, is a clinical diagnosis of moderate, persistent depression. Sufferers do not routinely experience the extremes of major depression, but the duration can be much longer. Dysthymia does not often inhibit normal activities.

The depression experienced in dysthymia sufferers tends appear almost as a personality trait. They tend to be self-critical and negative, with low self-esteem. Many dysthymics are unable to recall the last time they felt happy. According to UCSF an estimated 6% of the population will experience dysthymic disorder in their lifetimes.

Symptoms of Dysthymia

• Long-term depression, sadness, anxiety
• Fatigue, difficulty falling asleep or waking and not being able to fall back asleep
• Problems with memory or concentration
• Low self-esteem, guilt, or negative thinking; self-critical
• Depression seems part of one's personality, gloomy, no joy
• Unable to remember last time one was happy, confident, or inspired
• Unexpected weight loss or gain, eating problems
• Symptoms present for over two years

Bipolar Disorder

Also known as manic-depressive disorder, bipolar disorder results in dramatic mood swings in the sufferer. This psychological disorder is characterized by perpetual shifts between manic and depressive phases. During the manic phase, one may feel unnaturally confident, energetic, and out of control. The depressive phase shares many symptoms with major depression.

In a given year approximately one percent of the population will experience bipolar disorder, according to NIMH. The disorder often begins in adolescence or young adulthood. Bipolar is the only depressive disorder that is not heavily skewed toward women.

Symptoms of Bipolar Disorder

Manic Phase

• Little sleep, plenty of energy
• Exaggerated optimism, excessive self-confidence, euphoric mood
• Engaging in wreckless, inappropriate behavior
• Promiscuity, sexual aggression
• Distractible, unable to concentrate, too many ideas
• Abuse of alcohol or drugs
• Increased irritability
• Manic phase lasts at least one week

Cyclothymia

Cyclothymia is a mild form of bipolar disorder. It is characterized by mood fluctuations that shift between depressive and hypomanic phases. Cyclothymics do not experience the extremes of major depression or manic episodes.

The depressive or hypomania symptoms of cyclothymia may last for a few days to several weeks at a time, with brief intervals of normal mood in between. Personality changes are often evident to family and friends. Individuals who have a stable mood for longer than two months at a time are not likely cyclothymic. Symptoms may be mimicked by substance abuse, borderline personality disorder, or other mood disorder. A family history of depressive or bipolar disorders increases the risk.

Symptoms of Cyclothymia

Hypomanic Phase

• Excessive confidence and self-esteem
• Reduced ability to concentrate, easily distracted
• Sleep difficulties, excessive energy
• Heightened irritability
• Reduced inhibitions, may make foolish decisions
• Hypomania lasts between several days and several weeks

Depressive Phase

• Feelings of inadequacy, low self-confidence
• Difficulty falling asleep, unrestful sleep
• Fatigue, lack of energy
• Negative thinking, feelings of guilt and sadness
• Loss of interest in formerly enjoyable activities
• Depression lasting between several days and several weeks

The cycling between phases must be present for at least two years for a diagnosis (one year for teenagers). Work and family life are often negatively affected by the shifting moods.

Seasonal Affective Disorder

Seasonal Affective Disorder, or SAD, is a distinct form of depression triggered by the reduced level of sunlight during the winter months. As its name implies, the disorder is experienced seasonally and clears up with the onset of spring, which may bring about a mild manic phase. Prevalence increases at higher latitudes. SAD is rare within 30 degrees of the equator.

Seasonal Affective Disorder most often occurs in younger people, women in particular. Many people are not even aware of this diagnosis and do not seek treatment. All seems well again when the depression lifts in the spring. However effective treatment exists for SAD, so nobody has to suffer needlessly during the winter months.

Symptoms of Seasonal Affective Disorder

• Excessive sleeping, fatigue
• Eating more, carbohydrate cravings, weight gain
• Avoidance of others, withdrawl
• Depressive symptoms, i.e. low self-esteem, low motivation, sadness
• Decreased sex drive
• Onset in the fall and early winter
• Has occurred in each of the last two years

Postpartum Depression

Mild depressive symptoms are common among women following the birth of a child. However if these feelings are severe, the woman may be suffering from postpartum depression. Postpartum depression is a form of major depression experienced by an estimated one in eight mothers. Effective treatments exist for this condition.

Postpartum depression ranges in severity from mild to severe. Severe cases may be diagnosed as postpartum psychosis, a rare disorder characterized by violent thoughts, delusions, and bizarre thinking. This illness became more well-known as the media followed the Andrea Yates case.

Symptoms of Postpartum Depression

• Fatigue, irregular sleep
• Feelings of low self-worth, guilt, or depression
• Spontaneous crying
• Problems with memory and concentration
• Thoughts of violence
• Lack of interest in the new child
• Delusions or hallucinations
• Symptoms appear one week to six months following a birth